The Uncanny Thor
by The Uncanny R-Man
Summary: Chapter 5: The time of the Baldersleep is upon Asgard and the city's enemies are on the march. It's up to Thor and his allies to stop them. Will the might of the Thunder God, Beta Ray Bill, the Warriors Three, Lady Sif, the Enchantress and Kelda be enough to stop them? Part of the Uncanny Marvel Universe.
1. Hildy the Heroic: Part 1

**The Uncanny Thor**

**Chapter 1: Hildy the Heroic- Part 1**

**By**

**The Uncanny R-Man**

**Disclaimer- **_All familiar characters belong to Marvel Comics._

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* * *

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**Asgard-**

It was another beautiful day in the golden city of Asgard, home to Thor and the rest of the Norse Pantheon. Lessons had finished for the morning at the school for warriors, and the young Asgardians were enjoying their time away from lessons.

Not all of the students were happy, however. Gunnhild (or Hildy as she preferred to be known), one of Volstagg the Voluminous' many children, was not having a very good time at warrior's school. She was the only girl in pretty much the entire school, just as Lady Sif was many years ago. It was often believed that Asgardian females were more use at home looking after the children, or healers and occasionally magic-users.

Hildy sighed heavily as she unwrapped the piece of bread and apple that her mother had given her.

'Look, it's Hildy the Manly.' Sigurd, one of Hildy's classmates taunted her. Sigurd's lackeys hooted in laughter at their leader's joke. Unfortunately, there were bullies is Asgardian schools just as there were in mortal schools. 'Shouldn't you be learning how to cook? Or has your pig of a father eaten all the food?'

Sigurd's lackeys hooted in laughter once more. Unfortunately for Sigurd and his minions, Hildy had a line, and they had just crossed it. Nobody insulted the mighty Volstagg!

'Take it back!' Hildy howled as she leapt upon Sigurd and began beating on him. 'Take it back!'

'Ahh! She's gone mad!' Sigurd cried out, trying to protect himself from Hildy's blows. 'Help me! Get her off!'

Sigurd's lackeys all looked at each other.

'Hildy's insane! I'm not going to help!'

'Aye, let's get out of here!'

Sigurd's lackeys turned tail and ran away as fast as their legs could carry them.

'You are not worthy to speak the name of my father!' Hildy spat as she wailed upon Sigurd. 'You have no idea how much of a hero he is!'

Hildy felt a strong hand on her shoulder pull her away. It was Heimdall, the all-seeing and all-hearing sentry of Asgard. He had been in his usual position guarding the Golden City when his godly senses alerted him to the commotion at the warrior's school.

'Hildy, that's enough.' Heimdall stated as he separated the daughter of Volstagg from her quarry. 'What happened here?'

'She just went mad, Heimdall.' Sigurd said as he wiped his bloody nose. 'I merely came here to wish Hildy my greetings when she leapt upon me.'

'Hmm, is that so?' Heimdall frowned. The all-seeing Asgardian didn't need his godly senses to tell him that Sigurd was lying. 'Sigurd, go to the healers and clean yourself up. Hildy, come with me to see Balder.'

Hildy sighed heavily as she allowed herself to be led away. She was in trouble this time. The only time students went to see Balder was when they were in serious trouble. Brawling during school hours was sure to be one of those times.

* * *

**A little while later-**

Hildy was now standing for Balder the Bright, Asgard's fair ruler. With Thor always off in fair Midgard with the Avengers, it had come to Balder to rule in his stead. The Bright One steepled his fingers and regarded the young Asgardian before him.

'Now Hildy, this is not the first time you have been brought here before me for brawling during lessons, is it?'

'No, Balder.' Hildy bowed her head shamefully. 'It is not, but Sigurd keeps insulting my father. He calls him a pig and a coward. Volstagg is none of those things!'

'All of Asgard knows how brave your father is, Hildy.' Balder responded. 'I have fought by his side many times. He is one of our lord Thor's closest friends. A person does not become friends with Thor if they do not have at least some shred of bravery. However, your latest outburst could not have come at a worse time. The Baldersleep is almost upon me. I dare say I do not have to explain to you how important this time is.'

'No, Balder.' Hildy shook her head. She fully understood just how important recent weeks would become. As ruler of Asgard, Balder had to sleep for an entire day once every year in order to regain his health and power, just as Odin and Thor had done before him. During that time, the many enemies of Asgard often attempted to conquer the Golden City, so all those within had to be on guard.

'Your father is due back from Midgard soon, so you had best return to your classes.' Balder advised the young Asgardian. 'Try to stay out of trouble until then.'

Hildy simply nodded in response and headed back to her classes.

* * *

**The home of Volstagg the Voluminous, later-**

Hildy was assisting her mother and the rest of her brothers and sisters prepare for dinner. Volstagg would be sure to be hungry after his return from Midgard. Then again, Volstagg the Voluminous was always hungry.

'You are in so much trouble!' Rolfe, one of Hildy's brothers, lightly teased her. 'Father is going to be ever so angry.'

'Shut up, Rolfe.' Hildy retorted. 'I was defending his honour.'

'Father's going to be _ma-aa-ad._' Rolfe continued.

'I told you, _shut up!_' Hildy yelled, brandishing one of the dishes at her brother.

'Mother! Hildy and Rolfe are fighting again!' Flosi, one of Hildy's sisters, called.

'Rolfe, stop picking on your sister.' Hildegund, Hildy's mother and Volstagg's wife, called from the kitchen. 'And Hildy, stop fighting with your brother. We need to finish preparing dinner before your father and his friends return.'

Hildy and Rolfe did as they were told and carried on preparing the dinner table, occasionally glaring at each other.

_**BOOM!**_

The door to the dwelling was thrown open as the master of the house returned home.

'Ho, family!' Volstagg's voice boomed from just outside the house. 'Where are the children of the mighty Lion of Asgard?'

'The mightily fat Lion of Asgard.' Fandral the Dashing quipped.

'Silence!' Volstagg responded. 'The very ground of Asgard quakes beneath Volstagg's boot!'

'All thanks to his enormous girth.' Hogun joined in the friendly ribbing of the Voluminous One.

'Come to me, my children!' Volstagg beckoned his offspring. 'We have gifts from fair Midgard!'

'Yaaaay, father!' The children of the Voluminous One squealed as the pounced upon the hefty Asgardian. Normal men would collapse under the onslaught of so many children, but Volstagg was no mere man.

Volstagg sauntered into his home, barely showing any sign of struggle from the weight of all the children clinging to him.

'Greeting too to the finest woman of all Asgard.' Volstagg said as he kissed his wife on the cheek. 'The days I was away in Midgard seemed like an eternity without your beautiful face, milady.'

'Oh, hush.' A blushing Hildegund smiled as she beckoned everybody over to the table. 'Come, dinner is ready.'

'Ah, my favourite words.' Volstagg grinned as he rubbed his hands together in glee. 'Come family, friends, let us eat!'

* * *

**After dinner-**

'Ahh, delicious…' Volstagg sighed happily as he sat back in his seat. 'I have missed your fine cooking, Hildegund.'

'Oh, stop it.' Hildegund tutted. 'Rolfe, help me and your sisters clean up while your father talks to Hildy, will you?'

'Aww, mother…' Rolfe groaned.

'_Rolfe!_' Hildegund snapped at her son. Rolfe knew better than to argue with his mother, so he did as he was told and followed the rest of his siblings into the kitchen.

Volstagg leant forwards to talk to his daughter.

'So Hildy, what is this I hear of you fighting during classes?' The Voluminous One asked.

'It was Sigurd.' Hildy explained. 'He called you a pig and a coward. I couldn't stand back and let him besmirch your honour like that.'

'Indeed.' Volstagg nodded. 'I trust you did smite him well?'

'_Volstagg!' _Hildegund hissed at her husband from the kitchen. Volstagg cleared his throat before continuing.

'Ahem. Yes. Fighting is bad. Of course. You should not fight during class, no matter how good your intentions.' Volstagg said. 'How many times have you been disciplined for fighting in class?'

'So you expect me to just stand back and allow everybody to insult you?' Hildy countered.

'Your father is right, Hildy.' Hogun chipped in. 'Aye, your intentions were good, but there is a time and place for fighting. Class time is not that time.'

'This has to stop, Hildy.' Volstagg continued. 'How are you to become a fine warrior if you are thrown out of school? What will happen to you then?'

'I have an idea that might help.' Fandral said. 'Remember what happened to Thor when Odin found him to in need of discipline?'

'Aye, he was stripped of his memories and banished to Midgard.' Hogun remembered.

'What? I am to be banished?' Hildy yelled. 'Mother! Can you hear this?'

'Perhaps it is for the best, dear.' Hildegund said as she walked in from the kitchen. 'Not the banishing part, but maybe spending some time in Midgard could help you.'

'I know somebody that would be more than willing to assist you, Hildy.' Volstagg told his daughter. 'She is one of the finest warriors in Midgard. She has defeated many villains in her short time as a hero.'

Hildy's face lit up as she recognised the person her father was describing. She had hugely enjoyed the tales her father had told of his friend's brave exploits in Midgard.

'Father, you do not mean…' Volstagg simply nodded in response.

'Oh, I do, my dear Hildy. Now come, we must prepare for your departure…'

**TBC…**

* * *

**Next: Hildy the Heroic- Part 2**

_Who does Volstagg have in mind to mentor his daughter? Will I ever plan to feature Thor in this story? Tune in next time to find out…_


	2. Hildy the Heroic: Part 2

**The Uncanny Thor**

**Chapter 2: Hildy the Heroic- Part 2**

**By**

**The Uncanny R-Man**

**Disclaimer- **_All familiar characters belong to Marvel Comics._

* * *

**Asgard-**

Thor entered the quarters of Balder the Brave. The acting ruler of Asgard had summoned the Thunder God to address him on important matters.

'I am sorry to call you here at such short notice.' Balder apologised. 'But as you know, the Baldersleep is almost on me and Asgard needs all the protectors it can muster.'

'There is no need to apologise to me, my friend.' Thor smiled. 'Asgard can always depend on the God of Thunder in its time of need.'

'I know that you have just arrived back from Midgard, but I require you to return once more.' Balder explained. 'I believe you are aware of the Hildy situation.'

'Aye, the daughter of Volstagg.' Thor nodded in understanding. 'What do you wish of me, Balder?'

'Volstagg believed it best that Hildy stayed in Midgard for a while in an attempt to soothe her temper.' Balder continued. 'Very much like when Odin did banish you many years ago. Volstagg suggested one of your fellow heroes could take her into their care.' The God of Thunder rubbed his chin in thought. He had to admit, the time on Midgard did do him a lot of good, and perhaps it would do the same for Hildy. He ended up struck by inspiration.

'I have a fair idea who the Voluminous One has suggested.' Thor surmised. 'Doreen Green, correct?'

'Aye.' Balder nodded. 'The one known as Squirrel Girl. Who better to care for a young woman in need of assistance?'

'Then you wish me to transport Hildy to Midgard.' Thor continued. 'Was there anything else you required of me?'

'Aye. I require you to bring some of our fellow Asgardians back home.' Balder answered. 'It seems that Kelda has been wandering Midgard again.'

'Very well.' Thor nodded. 'I shall do as you request. Also, I have several ideas for other candidates to assist in the defence of Asgard during the Baldersleep.'

* * *

**The House of Volstagg, a little while later-**

The time had come for Hildy to depart for Midgard. Hildegund, the girl's mother, was fussing over the young Asgardian.

'Mother, please…' Hildy implored her mother. 'I am sure I have enough supplies for the journey.'

'How will you know that you will like the food in Midgard?' Hildegund countered. 'It is much better if you take some home-cooked food with you.'

'I would still love to sample some of that ice-cream substance that father described.' Hildy sighed dreamily. 'Pizza too…'

'Just be careful in Midgard, my darling.' Hildegund sniffled as she hugged her daughter close. 'It is full of dangers.'

'That is just what I was hoping for.' Hildy smiled eagerly. 'What is the use of making a journey if there are no villains to fight?'

'Now dear, you know that you are not going there to fight.' Hildegund reminded her daughter, shaking her head. 'You are travelling to Midgard to train, not seek petty battles.'

'What if the battles were to seek Hildy out?' Volstagg asked as he put a comforting arm around his wife's waist. 'No daughter of Volstagg would let an evildoer go unpunished.'

'Just make sure you remain safe.' Hildegund said. 'Now come, give your mother a hug.'

'Mother…' Hildy groaned in embarrassment. 'Must I?'

'Do as your mother tells you.' Volstagg told his daughter. 'I will wait outside for you until you have finished your goodbyes.'

* * *

**The grounds outside Avengers Mansion, Midgard-**

The leaves in the trees around the home of the Earth's Mightiest Heroes were shaken in the branches as the winds began to blow heavily. Passers-by clutched their hats and coats close to their bodies against the wind's onslaught.

_**KRAKOOM!**_

Thor and Hildy appeared on the sidewalk outside the mansion in a bolt of lightning. Hildy put out and arm to prop herself up in an attempt to regain her balance.

'I hope I do not have to repeat that any time soon…' The young Asgardian grimaced.

'My apologies, Hildy.' Thor told his young companion. 'Trans-dimensional travel is not to everybody's taste.'

'Is this our destination?' Hildy asked as she looked up at the building.

'Aye. This is the home of my fellow Avengers.' Thor explained. 'Shall we see if anybody resides within?'

Hildy followed the God of Thunder inside, ignoring the stares the passers-by shot their way.

'Way to make an appearance, eh Goldilocks?' Peter Parker smirked as he headed down the corridor to see what was going on. Peter's young daughter May was holding his hand. 'Hey, who's your friend?'

'This is Hildy, the daughter of Volstagg.' Thor introduced the pair. 'Hildy, this is Peter Parker, one of my fellow Avengers.'

'It is an honour to meet you, Mister Parker.' Hildy bowed respectfully as she knelt down on one knee. 'My father has told me of your many adventures.'

'Wow. You sure raise them polite in Asgard, don't ya?' Peter blinked in bemusement. 'This is my daughter, May. Say hello to Hildy, sweetie.'

'Hi.' May smiled shyly. 'I like your braids. They're pretty.'

'Thank you, May.' Hildy smiled in response. 'Perhaps later I will show you how to braid your own hair.'

'Oh, daddy can I?' May squealed in excitement. 'Can I? Can I? Can I?'

'What harm could it be?' Peter chuckled. 'Now come on, let's go see what your mother's up to, 'kay?'

'Bye-bye, Hildy.' May waved as she was led away.

'Farewell, May.' Hildy waved back. 'I look forward to seeing you again.'

'See, you are making friends already.' Thor smiled. 'Now, let us seek out the rest of the Avengers…'

* * *

**Later-**

All of the introductions had been made apart from the one person Thor and Hildy had been seeking. Squirrel Girl was yet to return from her latest run of errands. Hildy waited patiently for the arrival of her would-be mentor.

'So Hildy, you're Volstagg's daughter…' Janet Van Dyne remarked warmly in an attempt to break the ice. 'You must be proud to have him as your father.'

'Oh, you have no idea, Miss Van Dyne.' Hildy smiled. 'I would never wish to have any other man as my father. I love him dearly and would fight to the death to defend his honour.'

'Oh, that's just… lovely.' Jan blinked in surprise. 'More tea?'

'Do you have any pizza?' Hildy enquired.

'Sorry I'm late guys…'

Jan and Hildy turned to regard the person that was speaking to them. Doreen Green, the young heroine known as Squirrel Girl, was standing in the doorway. The young woman was towelling off her hair.

'You wouldn't believe the trouble I just had.' Doreen recounted. 'I was running my errands when who should try to rob a bank but the Sandman. I have so much sand in my tail. It's going to take hours to brush it all out.'

The fluffy-tailed heroine then noticed that Jan had a guest.

'Oh gosh, I'm sorry.' Doreen apologised. 'I didn't realise we had company. Hi, I'm Doreen. You must be Hildy. Volstagg has told me so much about you. He is ever so proud of you.'

Hildy knelt before Doreen and bowed her head.

'It is a great honour to meet you, Miss Green. I pledge myself to your training.'

'Jeepers.' Doreen blinked. 'How about I finish drying myself off then I'll show you around, okay?'

* * *

**Avengers Complex, Malibu, California-**

With Hildy moved into Avengers Mansion, Thor headed off to recruit some assistance to defend Asgard during the Baldersleep. His first stop was Avengers Complex, the home of the West Coast Avengers. No sooner had the God of Thunder arrived then USAgent came running out of the building.

'What the hell do you think you're doing?' The black-clad hero yelled. 'You can't just come her unannounced. I don't care what you're the god of…'

Thor wasn't intimidated by USAgent in the least.

'I come here seeking the aid of Beta Ray Bill.' Thor stated. 'Will you step aside or will I have to move you myself?'

'Oh, why do I freaking bother?' USAgent groaned in exasperation. 'Go on in. Everybody else does.'

'What seems to be the problem, Walker?' Beta Ray Bill asked as he peeked outside the door. 'Ho, Thor!'

'Ho, Bill!' Thor grinned as he hugged his alien friend close. 'I seek your assistance during the Baldersleep.'

'Asgard requires my assistance? Then say no more.' Beta Ray Bill nodded. 'Come, let us depart immediately.'

'Hey, you can't just desert your post, soldier!' USAgent told the alien hero. 'You're a member of the West Coast Avengers, remember?' The former Captain America groaned as he noticed that his demands had fallen on deaf ears. 'Aww, hell. Forget about it. Just go do whatever you want. Nobody ever listens to me in this place. You'd think that I'm the only one that cares about discipline in this place…'

**TBC…**

* * *

**Next: One Of Our Gods Is Missing**

_Thor and Beta Ray Bill head to Broxton, Oklahoma in search of the storm goddess Kelda. Also introducing: Bill, born of Bills!_


	3. One of our Gods is Missing

**The Uncanny Thor**

**Chapter 3: One Of Our Gods Is Missing**

**By**

**The Uncanny R-Man**

**Disclaimer- **_All familiar characters belong to Marvel Comics._

* * *

**Broxton, Oklahoma-**

Thor and Beta Ray Bill flew through the skies above Broxton, a small town in the middle of Oklahoma. They could have easily used Thor's hammer to transport them there, but it was just as easy to fly.

'Perhaps we should begin looking for Kelda in the diner below.' Thor suggested. 'The people therein may be able to direct us to the one we seek.'

The pair landed in the middle of the street opposite a diner. The sudden arrival of the heroes didn't go unnoticed. Several people stopped in their tracks and watched as Thor and his companion entered the diner.

'Hey, ain't that blond fella one of them Avengers?' One passer-by asked another.

'He ain't no ordinary Avenger.' The second passer-by responded. 'That's Thor, he's a god or something'.'

'What d'you think a god would want with Bill's Diner?' Passer-By Number One asked. Passer-By Number Two simply shrugged.

'Hey, even gods have gotta eat.'

Inside the diner, Thor headed straight towards a blond-haired man wearing a red baseball cap and apron at the counter.

'Evenin' fellas, what can I get ya?' The man said, barely batting an eyelid at the fact that a god and an orange-skinned alien with a face like a horse had just walked in through the door.

'My companion and I have come in search of a goddess by the name of Kelda.' Thor explained. 'Perhaps you have seen her.'

'Yeah, Kelda's just out back on her break.' The fellow at the counter stated. 'She ain't in no trouble, is she?'

'We merely wish to speak with her.' Thor told the man. 'Her presence is required back in Asgard.' The hat-wearing man motioned to a vacant booth.

'Take a seat and I'll bring her right over.' Thor and Beta Ray Bill took a seat in the vacant booth. Several patrons turned to regard the new arrivals.

'I hope my presence has not disturbed the townsfolk.' Bill frowned slightly.

'I am sure that is not the case, my friend.' Thor reassured his companion. 'They may be simple folk, but they are a lot more tolerant than you think.'

It didn't take the hat-wearing gent very long to bring Thor and Beta Ray Bill the one they sought. Kelda was a beautifully pale, blonde goddess.

'Greetings Thor.' The blonde goddess nodded in greeting. 'I believe my presence is required back in Asgard. Is the Baldersleep upon us already?'

'I am afraid so, Lady Kelda.' Thor answered. 'Balder has bid me to bring assistance for the defence of Asgard.'

The hat-wearing fellow walked over with a pot of coffee.

'Can I get you fellas some coffee? It's made fresh.' The man enquired. 'How about some pie? Kelda just made it.'

'You made pie?' Beta Ray Bill blinked in confusion.

'Aye. William was kind enough to find me a job here.' Kelda responded. 'I have found myself quite adept at baking.'

'William?' Thor asked. 'Who is this William?'

'That would be me, fellas.' The hat-wearing fellow with the pot of coffee stated. 'William the Third, but everybody calls me Bill. My gramps is Big Bill, this is his diner, and my pa is Little Bill.'

'We must apologise for taking Kelda away from you.' Thor said.

'Aww, think nothing of it.' Bill smiled. 'If Kelda's needed back home, then I ain't gonna argue. Heck, I'd do the same if my home was in trouble. So, how about that coffee, huh? On the house.'

'Well, we do still have some time before the Baldersleep begins.' Thor nodded. 'Perhaps some of the pie that Kelda has made.'

'Coming right up.' Bill grinned.

_**BADOOM!**_

The windows of the diner shook from the force of an explosion a short distance away.

'That came from the direction of the bank.' Bill said. 'We ain't got much in Broxton, a couple of stores, and this diner. The bank building's been around almost as long as there's been a Broxton.'

'Then the coffee and pie shall have to wait.' Beta Ray Bill nodded in understanding. 'We have villains to fight!'

* * *

**Outside-**

'Haw! We shoulda done this ages ago.' Wrecker of the Wrecking Crew hooted in evil glee. 'There ain't no cops around fer miles!'

'And these bozos from the sheriff's department break too easily.' Piledriver said as he dumped another unconscious officer into a pile. 'This ain't no challenge at all.'

'Famous last words, Piledriver.' Thunderball said as he spun his wrecking ball around, crushing a nearby parked truck. 'Heroes have an unfortunate habit of turning up no matter where we attempt to try our luck.'

'Aww, you worry too much.' Bulldozer snickered. 'What sort of hero would wanna protect a two-bit town like this?'

_**KRAKOOM!**_

An enchanted hammer smashed Bulldozer on the back of the head, sending him tumbling into an already wrecked truck.

'Awright. Time for a bit of fun.' Wrecker grinned eagerly, patting his crowbar in anticipation.

'You have chosen the wrong town to attack, Wrecker.' Thor said as Mjolnir returned to him. 'Surrender now, and you will remain unharmed.'

'I think you already know the answer to that, Goldilocks.' Wrecker snorted in derision. 'Lets wreck 'em, boys!'

Bulldozer clambered back up to his feet and charged at Thor.

'_**Rrrraaaagh!**_'

_**SPANG!**_

The Thunder God easily deflected the villain's charge with a strike from Mjolnir, sending him sailing off into the distance.

'Maybe this wasn't such a good idea.' Piledriver said. 'My back still kinda hurts from that time in London.' **(1)**

'Don't be such a coward, Piledriver.' Thunderball said as he spun his wrecking ball above his head. 'What could two heroes and one little woman possibly do to us?'

'You will see that I am more than a mere woman.' Kelda stated as she held her hands outwards.

_**FWOOSH!**_

Thunderball found himself encased in ice. Kelda was indeed more than a mere woman, she was the goddess of the storms and ice.

Piledriver continued to back away until he felt himself bump into something large. He turned around to see Beta Ray Bill standing behind him, patting his hand with his hammer.

'Uh… Nice horse?' The villain offered lamely. 'Want a sugar cube?'

_**SMITE!**_

Beta Ray Bill stuck the villain, sending him sailing into the distance alongside Bulldozer.

'Your allies have been defeated, Wrecker.' Thor stated as he and his compatriots advanced on the villain. 'It would be wise to surrender.' Of course, Wrecker wasn't having any of it. The villain raised his crowbar in the air and went for the God of Thunder.

'Go to hell, you yellow-haired son of a…'

_**FWOOSH!**_

Wrecker found himself encased in ice, just like Thunderball.

'Do the villains in Midgard never listen to reason?' The storm goddess asked.

'They are all as stubborn as they are stupid.' Beta Ray Bill nodded in response. 'These four especially.'

* * *

**Asgard, meanwhile-**

A balding grey-bearded warrior with an eye patch and a large scar down one side of his face was sitting staring into his almost empty tankard of mead in a dingy tavern somewhere in Asgard.

'Might I join you?'

The balding warrior looked up with bleary eyes and blinked a few times to straighten out his vision. He couldn't see the face of the man speaking to him for his face was covered by a hood.

'I seek no company.' The warrior retorted drunkenly. 'Begone.'

'Not even if that company has another flagon of mead for you?' The hooded figure enquired. The drunken warrior's face soon lit up in a smile.

'Come, sit. Sit with me, friend.' The warrior beckoned to the stranger. 'Adrik is always happy to sit with those with mead in their hands.'

The hooded stranger took a seat opposite Adrik and leant closer.

'Tell me Adrik, why is such a fierce warrior as yourself sitting in a begrimed tavern when he could be at home enjoying the company of his wife and children?' The stranger asked.

'Alas, frost giants claimed both my wife and son many years ago.' Adrik sighed sadly, swaying slightly in his seat.

'Hmm, yes. How unfortunate.' The hooded stranger nodded. 'Look at that, you seem to have finished your mead. I was going to offer you another, but I see that it will not be necessary. Sleep now Adrik, for I will have need of you later…'

**TBC…**

* * *

**Next: London Calling**

_Thor continues on his search for assistance defending Asgard during the Baldersleep. His next stop: London and the Enchantress!_

* * *

**Author's Notes-**

**(1)- **_Piledriver was almost crippled by the mutant known as Outlaw in Chapter 29 of '_Uncanny Deadpool_'._


	4. London Calling

**The Uncanny Thor**

**Chapter 4: London Calling**

**By**

**The Uncanny R-Man**

* * *

**Disclaimer- **_All familiar characters belong to Marvel Comics._

* * *

**Broxton, Oklahoma-**

Thor and his allies watched as the authorities carted away the Wrecking Crew. The quartet of villains had attempted to rob a bank in the little town of Broxton, figuring that there wouldn't be any heroes living in a tiny little town such as Broxton. Unfortunately, Thor was there recruiting assistance for the upcoming Baldersleep.

'I feel that I am duty bound to assist in the rebuilding of damages.' Thor told his allies. 'I feel partly responsible for this situation.'

'Aww, don't fret so much.' Bill, the fry cook of a local diner, smiled. 'Heaven knows what would have happened if you weren't here to fight those guys. Heck, it's nice to get a little excitement in Broxton for once.'

'It has been an honor meeting you, William.' Thor smiled as he shook the mortal's hand. 'I would love to stay, but we must make haste. The Baldersleep is almost upon us, and we have one more destination to travel to.'

'Then let me come with ya.' Bill suggested. 'You guys'll need medical help if there's gonna be a big battle, right? I know a fair bit of first aid, an' giving your people aid can't be all that different from human first aid.'

'William I care for you deeply, but the Baldersleep is no place for a mortal.' Kelda told him. 'It is not safe.'

'You saved Broxton from the Wrecking Crew, so I figure that I owe it to ya to help.' Bill continued. 'You gods are big on honor, ain't ya?'

'Indeed.' Thor confirmed. 'If William feels that he is honor bound to assist us, then we cannot refuse him.'

'With all due respect milord, I have a bad feeling about this.' Kelda frowned. The storm goddess cared greatly for Bill, and she didn't want to think what would happen if he was hurt.

'I already cleared it with Pa, so I'm ready to go when you are, fellas.' Bill said. 'Where we heading off to next?'

'Very well.' Thor nodded. 'Then we shall depart for England!'

* * *

**London, England-**

It was a beautifully sunny day in the city of London and Meggan Braddock was attending to her rooftop garden. The rest of Excalibur were off doing their own business, so Meggan decided to spend some time in the garden. Lizzie, Meggan's young daughter, was also helping her mother with the gardening.

'It's a lovely day today.' Meggan smiled at her daughter. 'Now, wouldn't you rather be out here in the garden instead of being cooped up inside watching the telly?'

'When are daddy and the others coming back?' Lizzie asked. 'Will they be happy when they see the garden?'

'They should be back soon.' Meggan told her daughter. 'They had some grown up stuff to sort out. I'm sure daddy will be really pleased when he sees everything we've done in the garden. It's nice to have some time off relaxing instead of fighting all the baddies.'

Lizzie squinted into the distance. Meggan noticed her daughter's concerned expression and reached out a comforting hand to place on her shoulder.

'What's the matter, love?' Meggan asked. 'Do you see something?'

'I can see people flying.' Lizzie explained. 'D'you think they're baddies here to get us?'

'I don't think so, poppet.' Meggan responded as she followed her daughter's gaze. 'I think they're goodies. Remember those Avenger people from America that are on the news sometimes? I think they've come to say hello.'

Lizzie's face lit up at the thought of the Avengers paying her a visit. 'Ooh! Do you think they'll want biscuits?'

'It'll be rude not to offer them some tea.' Meggan said. 'Put some biscuits on a plate and I'll be in to make the tea.'

Lizzie dashed off into the kitchen to get some biscuits ready for their guests while Meggan waited for Thor and his allies to descend.

'Hello, Thor.' Meggan waved in greeting. 'It's been a long time.'

'Aye, indeed it has.' Thor responded as he shook Meggan's hand. 'Apologies for our abrupt arrival, but is Amora here?'

'I'm afraid Amora isn't here right now.' Meggan apologised. 'She hasn't finished work yet, but you're welcome to come and wait inside. I was just about to put some tea on.'

'We have come here to seek help from the Enchantress?' Kelda exclaimed in disbelief. 'Are you sure that is wise?'

'Amora has turned over a new leaf in recent years.' Thor told the storm goddess. 'She has joined Excalibur, a British team of heroes not unlike the Avengers.'

'Who are your friends?' Meggan asked. 'I don't think we've met.'

'Apologies again.' Thor said. 'This is Beta Ray Bill of the West Coast Avengers, Lady Kelda, and Bill born of Bills.'

'It's lovely to meet you all.' Meggan smiled at the new arrivals. 'My name's Meggan. Now, come on in. Lizzie should have biscuits ready for you.'

* * *

**Inside-**

Thor and the others were gathered in the sitting room drinking tea with Meggan. The blonde-haired woman passed a plate of biscuits around for her guests.

'Help yourselves to biscuits.' Meggan offered. 'There's Chocolate HobNobs, custard creams, shortbread fingers, and even some pink wafer things.'

'That's very kind of you, ma'am.' Bill smiled. 'But are you sure we're not imposing?'

'Oh, hush.' Meggan chuckled. 'It's no trouble at all. It makes a nice change to entertain guests. Nowadays all I seem to do is fight bad guys.'

'Mum, the orange man looks like a pony.' Lizzie whispered to her mother.

'Lizzie, shush.' Meggan admonished her daughter. 'Sorry about that. Lizzie isn't used to strangers all that much.'

'I take no offence from your daughter's comments.' Beta Ray Bill reassured his host. 'I am quite used to people being unused to my appearance.'

While the others were talking, Kelda was examining the row of framed photographs on the mantelpiece.

'You seem to have many pictures of different people on your mantle.' Kelda stated. 'Are they all friends of yours?'

'Gosh, I wish.' Meggan laughed. 'That picture of me and the short fellow with the question mark tank top was taken at a Doctor Who convention. My husband took me there one year. Meeting the man that played the Seventh Doctor was the happiest day of my life. Well, apart from my wedding day and the day Lizzie was born, obviously.'

'I take it you are a fan.' Kelda surmised.

'You could say that.' Meggan laughed, indicating a shelf full of Doctor Who merchandise. 'You wouldn't believe all the Doctor Who stuff I have, but that photo is one of my most prized possessions. You know, I don't understand why people say that the Seventh Doctor's era wasn't any good. He was the Doctor when I was growing up. It wasn't as if all his stories were a load of rubbish. Lots of the other Doctors had stories that were much worse. Take a look at some of the Sixth Doctor's stories for instance…'

Meggan then noticed that everybody was staring at her blankly.

'Oh, goodness. I was babbling, wasn't I?' Meggan grimaced in embarrassment. 'I always babble when I talk about Doctor Who.'

The sound of the door closing alerted everybody to the fact that somebody had just arrived. Meggan heaved a sigh of relief at a change to alleviate her embarrassment.

'That should be Amora.' Meggan said. 'I'll go and tell her that you're here.'

Amora walked into the sitting room and jumped back slightly at the sight of Thor and his companions sitting there before her.

'Oh! Thor, what are you doing here?' The Enchantress enquired.

'The time of the Baldersleep is almost upon us, Amora.' Thor explained. 'I came here seeking your assistance for the upcoming battle.'

'I cannot come with you.' Amora shook her head. 'I have much to do here.'

'Amora, if Thor needs your help, we can handle everything here.' Meggan told her friend. 'Go protect Asgard. I'll look after the magic shop while you're gone.'

'Very well.' Amora nodded in understanding. 'I wish that the other Asgardians were as understanding as you are, Meggan. They will not be happy once they find out I will be walking amongst them once more.'

'If that is everything, then we must depart.' Thor said. 'We are ever grateful for the tea, Meggan. Perhaps next time we will be able to stay longer.'

'I'll hold you to it.' Meggan smiled. 'Now go and save Asgard. I want to hear all about it when you get back.'

With everything settled, Thor and his allies stepped outside to depart. The God of Thunder spun the mighty Mjolnir above his head and they all disappeared in a flash of light. Thor had everybody that he needed for the impending Baldersleep. He hoped that it would be enough.

* * *

**Meanwhile-**

Adrik, the old Asgardian warrior, awoke to find himself bound to a metal table.

'What?' Adrik whispered hoarsely.

'Ah. Glad to see that you're awake now, my dear Adrik.'

Adrik blinked his eyes in an attempt to clear his vision. An all too familiar figure wearing a horned crown was staring back at him.

_'Loki!_' Adrik spat at the God of Mischief. 'What are you doing to me, trickster?'

'I think it would be better if my associate were to explain.' Loki chuckled evilly as he stepped back to let a man in a green hooded cloak and an iron mask go about his business. 'Adrik, Doctor Doom. Doctor Doom, Adrik.'

Doom looked Adrik up and down and shook his head slightly.

'The subject isn't exactly in prime condition.' Doom sniffed in dismissal. 'Is this the best you could do?'

'Well, I couldn't exactly bring you a warrior in his prime.' Loki responded. 'They would be too easily missed. That was why I had to make do with poor old Adrik here. The dear fellow has no family that would miss him.'

'Then this will have to do.' Doom sighed.

'What are you going to do to me?' Adrik growled as he struggled against his bonds, but to no avail. Loki must have slipped something into his drink that sapped his strength.

'It is better to watch than to explain.' Loki chuckled as Doom lowered down a nasty looking machine full of blades and other unpleasant implements.

'No, please…' Adrik begged for mercy. 'I beg of you. _**Aaaaaaaughh!**_'

**TBC…**

* * *

**Next: The Baldersleep**

_With his allies gathered for the Baldersleep, Thor must protect Asgard while its ruler sleeps, but with the Golden City's enemies gathered to attack, defending the city won't be an easy task. Frost Giants and Trolls and Dark Elves, oh my!_


	5. The Baldersleep: Part 1

**The Uncanny Thor**

**Chapter 5: The Baldersleep- Part 1**

**By**

**The Uncanny R-Man**

* * *

**Disclaimer- **_All familiar characters belong to Marvel Comics._

* * *

**Asgard-**

The halls of Asgard were empty apart from the guards in front of Balder the Brave's quarters. As ruler of Asgard, Balder had to rest to regain his strength, just as Odin had before him. Thor would have had to do the same if he was in Balder's place, but the Thunder God was busy with his own business in Midgard. So the task of ruling Asgard came to Balder.

A flash of light and a loud boom announced the return of Thor and his allies. Before he had entered the Baldersleep, Balder had tasked Thor with recruiting assistance in the defence of Asgard. The Golden City had many enemies who would undoubtedly try to attack during Balder's slumber. It was the duty of all Asgardians to help in the defence of their home.

'Guard, is the Baldersleep upon us yet?' Thor asked one of the guards outside his friend's quarters.

The guard was about to answer when the door to Balder's quarters swung open and Sif stepped outside.

'I thought it was you, Thor.' The warrior woman stated. 'I heard your arrival.' Then she noticed the presence of a former enemy. 'What is _she_ doing here?'

'The Enchantress has come to assist us in the defence of Asgard.' Thor told his lover.

'If you are going to ask enemies for help, why not ask Ulik or Malekith the Accursed?' Sif retorted bitterly. 'You might as well ask Loki while you are at it.'

'Now, Sif…'

'Ah Thor, you're finally here…' Balder said weakly as he stepped out of his quarters. 'I did not wish to enter the Baldersleep until your arrival.'

'What would you have me do, my friend?' Thor asked.

'You are to assist Tyr in organising the defence of Asgard…' Balder answered, before trailing off. Sif propped up the weakening god and led him back into his quarters.

'Come Balder, we must prepare.' The warrior woman then glared back outside to Thor and his guests. 'We will have words about this, Thor. I can promise you that.'

Everybody that wasn't the Thunder God or the Enchantress all looked at each other uncomfortably. It was the human Bill who chose to break the awkward silence.

'Well, it seems like you godly fellas have women troubles just as much as us mortals.'

* * *

**Later-**

Once Balder had fallen asleep, Sif had joined Thor and his guests. The warrior woman hadn't started getting on to Thor about the presence of the Enchantress yet, they had much more important things to worry about than the presence of a former enemy.

'Heimdall has reported the massing of our enemies at four different points.' Tyr, the God of war, stated as he indicated the map laid out on a table in front of the group. 'The Frost Giants in the North, the Dark Elves in the East, the Trolls in the South, and the rest of the giants in the West.'

'It would be wise to split up out forces on those four points.' Thor stated. 'Tyr, you and I will combat the giants in the West. Beta Ray Bill and The Warriors Three will fight the Frost Giants in the North. Sif and Enchantress, you will assist the Valkyrie in fighting the Dark Elves in the East.'

The Thunder God stopped and looked at his lover. Sif would not be happy having to work with the Enchantress, but the warrior woman kept any protests she had silent, so Thor continued.

'Finally Kelda, you will assist the warriors in combating the Trolls in the South. Is everybody clear on what they are to do?'

'I have a question, my friend.' Beta Ray Bill said. 'Why have Asgard's enemies all chosen to march upon the city now? They could not have formed an alliance, could they?'

'No, the giants lack the intelligence to form an alliance on their own.' The Enchantress shook her head. 'Some outside must have gathered them all together.'

Sif thought of a comeback, something along the lines of the person behind the alliance of Asgard's enemies just as likely being the Enchantress, but she kept silent again. If Asgard was to keep standing, she could not afford to start picking fault now.

'Uh, sorry to interrupt sir…' Bill the Human piped up. 'But what about me?'

'Ah yes, William.' Thor nodded as he remembered the mortal among them. 'You stated that you are familiar with medicine, yes?'

'I'm not a doctor, but I know my fair share.' Bill explained. 'We all learned first aid at school.'

'Come, I will take you to the healers.' Thor said as he put a strong arm around the mortal's shoulders. 'They will inevitably need all the help that can get.'

'Milord, might I have a word with William for a moment?' Kelda chipped in. Thor simply nodded and stood aside.

'Kelda, why are you so worried?' Bill asked in confusion. 'It's not like I'm the one going out to bat…'

Kelda cut off her mortal lover's words by a loving kiss on the lips. Once the Goddess of the Storms broke off the kiss, Bill was left there looking rather flustered.

'Stay safe for me, William.' Kelda told him as she departed to meet the warriors she had been assigned to help. The group all looked back at Bill.

'Well, you all know what we've got to do. Let's get to it. Fight some bad guys!'

* * *

**The Western tip of Asgard-**

Thor had taken his place alongside Tyr and the rest of the warriors that had been assigned to defending the western part of Asgard. A messenger came running to the group with news from Heimdall in his watchtower.

'The giants are approaching, milords!'

'Many thanks, messenger.' Thor thanked the messenger. 'Take your place inside the city with the others.' The messenger simply nodded as he made his way into the city where those Asgardians not assigned to the defence of the city would be waiting.

The messenger's words were soon proven true as the warriors were alerted to a rumbling sound coming from the distance. It was the sort of rumbling that would only come from the sound of massive marching feet. Thor started to spin his enchanted hammer in preparation for the incoming battle. The warriors all shifted in their places. It had been such a long time since any of them had seen a good battle, and they were eager to get to smiting some giants.

'Prepare your weapons, men!' Tyr commanded the gathered warriors as he too readied his weapon. 'Let the poets sing songs of our victory! For tonight we dine in Hel!'

**TBC…**

* * *

**Next: The Baldersleep: Part 2**

_With the enemies of Asgard marching upon the city, will Thor and his allies be able to stop them? Tune in next time to find out!_


End file.
